I have a really great post in the works about the Sin and Redemption narrative, and how it's too easy to employ it when your Sin did a lot of real-world damage and your Redemption is way too easy. It was going to start with Jay-Z deciding that since he had a daughter he shouldn't use the word "bitch" anymore, and Paula Deen endorsing a Diabetes medication after years of hate crimes against healthy living. I would probably have moved on to Newt's ability to
be forgiven by God for his ongoing inability to keep it in his pants, Michael Vick's rise from his momentary fall from grace, and Schwyzer's confession to an attempted murder (after having consulted legal experts to make sure he'd suffer no legal consequences for admitting it).
Sadly, that post is in major rewrite -- it seems that early reports of Jay-Z's intent to stop using the word "bitch" might have been a hoax
So, some fluff!
The movie Showgirls first came out in 1995 (thank you, Wikipedia), and is notable for the fact that not even showing 170 tits could save it¹. Well, it seems that a mirror-universe version of Showgirls is in the works: Magic Mike
Unless a certain lady (the one with whom I saw 300 and Immortals) decides she wants company when she sees this movie, I'll probably give it a miss. However, I'm delighted that this movie is going to exist. It needs to. For over fifteen years, there's been proof that some guys will sit through any movie, no matter how bad, as long as it has tits in it (hell, I
watched the whole thing once...), and there's been no analogous movie for pecs and man-ass -- but very soon, there will be, and I'm sure it will be hilarious. I can imagine how certain lines from Showgirls
will translate across the mirror...
"He looks better than a ten-inch dick and you know it!"
"He's no butterfly. Tony, he's all pelvic thrust. I mean, he prowls. He's got it!"
"What is this, a cucumber? This is a stage, babe, it's not a patch. See ya."
"You fucking slut, you touch my make-up again and I'll fucking kill you."
"Oh, I'm a slut? Well, you fucked that kid from the pizza place!"
"Well, you fucked the meter reader!"
"Oh, you're fucking dead! "
"You want a knuckle sandwich?"
"Oh, can I have mine anally, please?"
"I like big cocks
. I always have. How about you?"
"I like having a big cock."
I know, I'm being a little unfair. There might actually be good writing in this movie, and so far, we really have no reason to believe there won't be. Soderbergh (the person directing Magic Mike) actually has some successful movies under his belt. But then, Verhoeven did, too. I'm also jumping a little too quickly to the conclusion that there'll be a lot of slash-tease, in the dialog I rewrote. There's a reason for that: I'm guessing that whatever the quality of the final product, it won't be just straight women going to see it.
- Yes, someone counted. Actually, a few someones counted, but they all come up with different numbers, including one odd number with all the even numbers. I'm guessing the lady in question was half out-of-frame, or the shot was of side-boob or something.